Cheats for Cheaters on Ashley Madison

We all know what “cheat” usually means at Ashley Madison. In this post I’ll give the word a new meaning borrowed from video games and show those who’re using the affairs site a few “secret” tricks that you may not have known yet.

noun. In video games, a code or a series of movements (whether intentionally programmed or a glitch) input by the player in order to achieve an advantage.
Source: Urban Dictionary

Should the things described here not make any sense to you, simply sign up at Ashley Madison and see for yourself or read the full review.

  1. Credit Warning on IM
  2. User ID
  3. Message Timing
  4. Collect Message Fees
  5. Priority Messages

Credit Warning on Instant Messages

Ashley Madison chat no-credit errorLet’s start with the simplest one. Sometimes, when you receive IM chat messages and you try to respond, you see an error like this one.

Don’t click Send Collect and don’t get scared away from your chat by this. You also don’t need to buy credits (although may want to for other reasons). Whoever messaged you already paid for initiating the session, so simply click Cancel. The warning will disappear and you can chat away.

The User ID

In the top-left corner of the screen, you can see your user ID. It’s a number, and because Ashley Madison simply counts that number up with every new member, you can tell how many members there were when you signed up.

That alone may not be so exciting, although it’s an easy way to confirm Ashley Madison’s membership claims. It gets more interesting when you check another user’s ID number. I ranted earlier about how it clutters up search results, but there actually is one useful bit to it. Ashley Madison now removed the number from profile pages (maybe they read my review? :-)), so to find it, you need to hover your mouse over one of the links under the picture and then look at the link target on the bottom of your browser, like so:
Ashley Madison User ID shows on mouse hover
Since all users are numbered sequentially, you can now roughly tell when that guy signed up! Just check what date range his user ID falls into:

  • Jan 2007 – 1,200,000
  • Sep 2007 – 1,700,000
  • Mar 2008 – 2,000,000
  • Aug 2008 – 2,500,000
  • Jan 2009 – 3,200,000
  • Apr 2009 – 3,600,000
  • Oct 2009 – 4,600,000
  • Mar 2010 – 5,400,000

That gives you an idea if he’s been around the block a few times or if he’s really “just trying out the site” as he may be claiming.

Time Your Messages

This is a trick I already wrote in my Ashley Madison tips for guys. If you want to catch a member who receives a lot of mail, write when she is online so that your message is right on top of her inbox. How?

Add him or her to your favorites and activate “Favorite Member Login” in your account contact options. You will get an email when your sweetheart logs in. If you’re not on your computer 24/7, have the notification forwarded to your mobile phone. When you get that email, move quickly! If you need some time to compose your masterpiece, do it beforehand and save it on your computer. When s/he comes on, paste and send.

Avoid Collect Message Fee

Ashley Madison says that once contact has been established with a member, all further messages are free. I recently had a chance to chat with Keith Lalonde, VP at Ashley Madison. He told me that accepting collect messages does NOT count as establishing contact. I find that quite sneaky and it hasn’t always been this way, but that’s their choice.

That means if you accept a collect message and then reply, you will be charged twice – once for the collect mail, once for your “first” email. To save some points, simply ignore the collect mail and write the member back directly. You can always say that there was an error and you couldn’t read the message. They’ll be happy to repeat whatever they wrote earlier.

Read Priority Messages Without Sending Receipt

I saved the best for last. I receive a lot of Priority messages. Those are the flagged, shaded ones that always sit on top of the inbox, no matter how old. But that’s not the only difference. Normally, the sender also gets a confirmation when I opened his message. Normally?

Well, sometimes I’m curious what he wrote but don’t want him to think I’m all interested.
Click on sender of priority message in Ashley Madison inboxStep 1:
Click the name in your Inbox.

Click to message member from Ashley Madison profileStep 2:
Open a message panel from his profile.

Click on message historyStep 3:
Message history.

Tagged : Ashley Madison, Tips

48 Responses to “Cheats for Cheaters on Ashley Madison”

  1. Dewey Velverton says:

    This post is going into my bookmarks.

  2. Curious says:

    Hey One Question!

    What about blocking profiles on AM?
    If I block someone can they still see my profile, know when I last logged on? It’s not exactly clear when you do it.
    I believe it mentions that they will no longer be able to contact you. Those two things aren’t mutually exclusive!


    • Michelle says:

      Good question, Christy! But no worries, a blocked profile will completely hide the two of you from each other. Neither the blocked person can find you (not even with a user name search), nor can you still find the blocked profile. The only way to see and unblock the person is via Lists -> Blocked Profiles.

      Maybe I do a separate post on this question…

  3. LoveXpert says:

    I have nothing but good things to say about Ashley! As a man, I have found nothing but wonderful women that are looking for the same things I am! I guess that’s the best part of AshleyMadison…everybody is there for the same reason!!!

  4. Mel says:

    I noticed this website on my new boyfriends computer. I got into his account but can’t access his mailbox. There was 6 new messages and 3 messages sent. Could these be old messages?

    • Michelle says:

      How do you know how many messages there are when you can’t get into the mailbox? Messages should have dates on them so you can tell how old they are.

      If you’re upset about all this, Mel, read my story (About page) and talk with your boyfriend. People cheat, it’s a fact of life. The question is how you deal with it.

  5. Jim says:

    Just found this awesome site, thanks for the tips! I found you while searching for a work around for a sneaky new ploy AM has started. If you’ve already established contact with someone you cannot continue messaging them or even read their mail (or any mail) unless you have a credit balance (ie, are a full member). What’s up with that!!!

  6. darryl bryant says:

    i am trying AM but how on earth do you pick a picture without getting caught? Can someone please recommend what is the best picture a man should put up on the site and still remain discrete? thanks.

    • C says:

      @darryl, If you’re not comfortable showing your face–don’t. I don’t; I just let the ladies know in my profile that I have pictures available to email. You can place a colorful square from an image editing program over your face. I’d also recommend displaying a picture where you are dressed up and looking sharp. Pictures of your shirtless self (or more graphic pics in your private showcase) are a turn-off for most women.

  7. C says:

    Yes, thanks for the tips as well! It took about a month of emailing/chatting and I had a successful date last week with an attractive like-minded woman. We’re seeing each other again this weekend.

    @Jim, I noticed that also about the Full Member Status when I ran out of credits the first time. I topped up a few weeks ago for that 200cr deal and am now down to 5cr. I now know not to use them to maintain my status. I just put in my profile that I will no longer accept “Collect Messages”… Hey, if the girls can be picky… why can’t we?

    I was later shocked when this young, cute Asian girl sent me a Priority Message!

  8. Bill says:

    So, I found this site now, but apparently they changed something since there is no cancel button and I can’t read conversations without buying credits. Is there a new way around this now?

  9. AMgirl says:

    Is there a way of getting around showing up in someone’s “viewed me” list if they’ve made contact with you before or if they are in your favorites list? I have someone that says he always looks at my pictures but never shows up in my list.

  10. Benji says:

    I do not use a home computer, I use my phone for everything on AM. Are there functions that I’m missing? Thanks

  11. Diggaddy says:

    I’m a puppy that’s chasing his own tail. I look at some dating web. n all that are about is sine up sine up money money. I’m taking a chance on this one. not sure what to say I’m here for the same thing every one is?? or am I?? what if this site is strait out here to catch the cheaters
    OH NO!! looks like I’m going to chance it one more time. ok still not to sure what to say take a chance with me n you will start taking more in your every day life. let’s have some out door fun ride bikes, peddle or dirt bike??? I’m looking forward to exploring beautiful fun adventures with a beautiful person. just have fun!!

  12. Diggaddy says:

    I didn’t know what to say on the first chit ,chat I’m an out door tipe but moves of tv night is ok with the. right girl??????? I’m 6` 225lb I dont have 6pac. abs a slightly 4 pac if u look closel. I’m working on that!! love food some times to much but I stay moving n I Bern it off. you know???? Let’s have fun???

    • Michelle says:

      Diggaddy, this here is a blog ABOUT dating sites. It isn’t a dating site itself. You won’t find “right girl???????” by posting comments on my blog, lol. And yea, get working on that six pack! ;-)

  13. imran says:

    Hi this is Imran..
    As am new to ashley madison. I can’t read my messages because of not having any credits .how can I make them through n read my messages…like how can I become a free member for this and step forward … @. imukhan757@gmail. Com

    • Michelle says:

      Imran, if someone sends you messages that they paid for, you can read them no matter if you have credits or not. If they send you collect messages, you need to spend credits to read them. Sorry, no “cheat” for that. If you can’t afford a few credits, then AM is probably not the right site for you.

  14. dave says:

    Hi, I have a question, not about cheats, but I just purchased a block of credits recently but have forgotten what my username was ( you know, from trying to be discreet). So when I tell them I have forgotten
    My username/ password and give them my email address, I don’t receive my login credentials, I don’t even get an email. I know they have my email correct because I used to get notifications showing who the new members were. Now I don’t even get that. Can you help me?

    • Michelle says:

      No sorry, I can’t help you. I have no special link to Ashley Madison. I’m just a regular user like you. :-( But their support is usually responsive. Try again?

  15. asaf says:

    A lot of girls talk to me in messages and than invite me to chat. Where this Chat?

  16. Karen G says:

    As a female member in Ashley Madison website where I purchased some credits – I figured out it was a waste of time – Why?
    1. Even though they explain in their long text format about handling the credits… long text…. using the chat or doing any action in the website eat you credits.. bad user experience.

    2. Their support was good and I spoke to a nice person on the other side.

    3. Its just – paying for every action you do in this website just lead me into a conclusion it wasn’t for me.

    4. I couldn’t even buy a smaller package of credit in case I wanted to contact a single man that I was interested after all my credit was gone.

    Just my 2 cents

  17. rafael says:

    another tip
    use your Ashley Madison ID the same of your email… then have a way to tell ppl the email domain… you´ll get free communication that way ;)

  18. IronyJohn says:

    One cheat I fell upon was the ability to give a private key to a member that refuses messages from non-full-members. To do this, send a Wink and attach your key with it that way — it works, but you won’t be able to take it back unless you become a full member.

  19. SafetyFirst says:

    How can you pay WITHOUT a credit card ? doesnt it kill the secrecy ?? (the transaction appears in the acct)

  20. mike says:

    A woman contacted me on AM and we began a conversation on kik for a few days when abruptly it stopped. Next time I was on I clicked on an old message and subsequently her profile, and it said profile cannot be found. Did she block me, cancel membership, or hide her profile?

  21. Andrew says:

    If I don’t have a credit card, how else do I pay for the service?

  22. Joshua says:

    Hi, on the Ashley Madison website, what is the name that shows up on your credit card statement? I need to be very discreet, since my wife looks at the statements every now and then.

  23. Richard Davis says:

    Why not have the balls to tell your partner you want sex outside your marriage. I allow my wife to have sex with other men and watch. Our relationship has never been better. Complete sexual freedom and no need to cheat. AM is dated. Just talk to your partner, open up and when you do another world opens up. Cheating is not fun never will be. An honest open sexual relationship is the future.

  24. Chrissy says:

    I see on AM that some profiles don’t have their “last login” showing. Is there a way to remove that so its not visible to others?

  25. Ken says:

    Nice blog, Michelle. I might add that AM is set up primarily to favor women, as men can do little but post a profile and browse the site without paying. It costs a minimum of $49 to take advantage of other site features (e.g., reading and sending messages), and beware: this is a recurring charge if the ‘topping up credits’ check box under Profile Options isn’t de-selected. There is also an obscure $19 charge for mobile access on the payment page, which, if not de-selected, will up the total minimum charge to $68. I’ve asked AM Customer Service a couple of times for a free trial period to check out all the site features, but have never received a response to this request. I think a good many of the female profiles are questionable at best, anyway, and all the winks and collect messages that start to come almost immediately serve merely to tempt men to pony up. In this, AM is no better than the other pay sites.

  26. Amber says:

    I am a little stumped about a possible cheater on the cheaters site (how ironic).
    If a person has taken their profile down but still appears in my favorites list logging in, are they really still on the site. Clicking on the profile shows the member no longer exists…but they show up in my favorites as having logged in an hour ago. Is this person bringing there profile up and then hiding it? I don’t get it…I don’t want to blame someone for something they didn’t do.

  27. Andie says:

    Hi’ I am a female user. I use mobile version. I know I’ve give Lin a good bit of people access to my pics. Those in my
    Mailbox are easy to find of course. Is there somewhere I can go just to see a list of who has access to my private photos, do you happen to know? Thx!

  28. JJ says:

    I gotta question, I let my girlfriend use my phone and I think she saw my search history. …but when I later checked it looked like she was looking up Amy Madison not Ashley. ..are they related?

    • Michelle says:

      No, Amy is a character from a children’s story. But if your girlfriend isn’t stupid she will figure out what you’re doing. The best way is not to try and hide things. Put it out in the open that you’d prefer an open relationship with certain rules. Most won’t agree with it, some will. You’ll be better off with the latter.

  29. tomaslong says:

    hi!how about if you are leaving a message and shows you that you need credits to send it?tnx

  30. verity says:

    So my boyfriend had a message on his phone it said new image with a link on to this dating website ? It said hi Andrew how have they got his number and name do u guys think he has joined ???xx

  31. Pdog says:

    I meet a woman one AM and she ended up not for me, I told her I decided not to have an affair. She hide her profile but has me as a favorite so she gets an email when i log on. Every time I log on she sends me a kik message asking to hang out. Is there a way to block someone that has their profile hidden?

  32. Sean says:

    Hi, if I send my photo to someone through AM message will it make its way online in my profile? Or is it safer to send it offline through personal email.

  33. rsh says:

    apparently i violated some policy of AM and they blocked my account…
    i created a new account and it worked fine accept i couldnt send or reply to messages.. i could get them.. and read them… just not send an answer.. so obviously ppl would think i was ignoring them..
    the site said the account approval would take 1 business day..
    i sent an email to them because it never got approved…
    they said i had violated the terms of the agreement.. but didnt say how..
    so i created yet another account.. each one of these accounts is different… hotmail, yahoo, gnail.. but each time i do it they block my account within 3 days.. and i am not entering any info or pics on the site other than the initial questions it asks when i sign up…
    anyone know whats going on??

  34. Welshchick says:

    Hi if I send a message to a guy will he be able to reply even if he has no credit.

    First time user (lady) and not getting a reply from someone im drawn too?


  35. Devon says:

    So why do done profiles have a lock in the bottom corner of their pic, and others don’t? Are the ones w the lock paying members?

  36. Marley says:

    So I’m a girl on AM. It’s a bit overwhelming when you’re a girl on there lol. There’s a couple of guys that I’m talking to now, so I don’t want to keep my profile public anymore. It seems like I haven’t gotten any messages since I hid it. Is it just a coincidence that these 3 guys all stopped talking for a couple of days or is it because I hid myself??

  37. opmerric says:

    There is some success for men on AM,but a very small % .
    I have used the site for some time,and for me the site just keeps taking,it seems to me there are several ways Am scam you out of your credits,let me run this by you,I receive collect message notices,the first thing I do now,is to check if that person as viewed
    my profile,on several occasions,they haven’t,so how can they know how to get in touch,when there not even in my profile?
    (scam)AM again playing games,I have had messages from people who I haven’t even messaged,and looking at the content of the message,it’s as if that person as had several conversation previously with me,I have message them and asked them do they have the right profile,and to double check and they say yes! figure that one out,I can’t.Now for your newbei’s lets talk about AM using BOTS ? automatically generated responses,it doe’s what it says on the tin,your not talking to a person,it’s a system that is set up to give a response,ever wondered why the message you sent ,came back with a reply with no similarity to what you had put down or maybe asked? i wish i had more space to continue righting but i havent,

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